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weaktwosFirst off, I goofed on the season pass selection and House didn't record. Clearly I like too much tv on Tuesday Nights.
Okay, I recorded Heroes on my Tivo.
Scene opens with Alexis Bledel's ex boyfriend jumping off the top of a skyscraper. It appears he can fly...or maybe not. Anyway, let me just say, if I broke up with Alexis Bledel, I'd be hurling myself off a tall building, too. Then he makes a bad pass at some woman. It appears he plays a nurse.
Switch to Madras, India. I see we're actually outsourcing our television scenes, too. Oh, and yet another show where we muse about how much of our brain power we actually use, and what would happen if we used one more percent? I'm thinking there would be more liberals out there. But oops, that's editorializing. But handsome Indian Professor finds out his father is dead. Apparently his father was involved in some controversial genetic research. So hot hindi professor is off to find his father's research papers and to find out more about why he died. Whatever the father's research was, it involved having a large world map placed on the wall.
Wow, it turns out that someone else was in his father's apartment in the next room while he entered. How lucky that he wasn't discovered.
Next scene, a hot young lass engaging in the entrepreneurial highjinks of webcam entertainment. Yes, it's a perfect time to play "Mustang Sally." Her customer is "Huggerz69" on AOL, given the interface. Oh! she's a single mom! Making a few extra bucks. This totally solves the child care problem.
Back to Alexis Bledel's ex. He thinks he can fly! He tells someone he can trust. Someone who doesn't believe him. Good job, big bro.
Back to cheerleader who can take infinite dirt naps without dying. She can impale herself. Ew. That bit with the exposed ribs was kinda gross. She's going to totally dust the competition at the annual "Bring it On" national cheerleader competition. She'll bring it, alright.
Change scene to a Japanese guy staring at a Japanese clock. He can make time reverse for one second. It looks like hard work. And he jumps up cheering and runs down the aisle to tell a friend. This Japanese friend happens to be watching mom's webcam. Everyone join me in singing "It's a Small World, After All".
And mom has some interesting powers with regard to her reflection. This comes to us during the end of a parent-teacher conference going badly.
Back to Alexis Bledel's ex. His mom's a klepto. She wants to feel alive again. Let the record reflect that his mother is a bitch. She's a major bitch.
Back to web-cam Mom. She's in debt and coming unravelled with this sense that someone else is watching her. Someone that she can't see. In addition to this nagging feeling that often plagues mental patients, she's 30k in debt.
Back to Cheerleader. She runs into a blazing factory fire. She wants to see if she can survive, but instead she leps a guy escape. She comes out as a human torch, but the burns heal. She runs off.
Hot Indian Professor has made it to Brooklyn. Queue Beastie Boys' "No Sleep 'Til Brooklyn". Oh, H.I.P. is getting a job as a taxi driver while he's here? Good to know. And he's got map locations that correspond to locations of our various potential heroes.
Switch scene to a flustered painter. A woman walks in. The same woman Alexis' ex tried to hit on. The painter's paintings are glimpses into the future. I wish he would paint me holding a billion dollars.
Back to Alexis' Ex. And his brother. His brother is offering him a job on his campaign. Let's recap: Mother is a bitch. Brother is a Son of a Bitch. He ditches his self-ish bro and hops into the cab of the H.I.P. What a coincidence. HIP's name is Mohinder, I think.
A special moment is coming: a solar eclipse. Web-cam mom goes back home and catches the hoods that are about to collect their 30k. The sleezebags ask for a strip show to give her an opportunity to lower her debt a little. I have a feeling they are about to get their asses kicked. Or maybe not. One of them appears to punch her as we cut to Japan.
Japanese guy is going to develop his powers and weave in and out of the space time continuum. But first, he's going to Karaoke night. Oh, and he's an X-men fan. Shocking. He proves his power by...
...Moving to a new scene, back to web-cam mom. She has indeed violently killed the mobsters. Or some other self only seen in mirrors. Hmmm.
We cut to Alexis' Ex. He ditches the cabby and runs to go meet Simone.
The creepy dude in HIP's Dad's apartment has trailed him back to New York. Mohinder stops the cab and runs like the dickens away from the strange guy with glasses.
Back to home of Cheerleader. Mother has froofy dumb dog. Cheerleader tells mom that she walked through fire and didn't get burned. Mom thinks she's speaking in metaphors. I want to euthanize Mr. Muggles. Even though he didn't do anything wrong.
Back to Japanese guy. He teleported into the woman's bathroom and got himself bounced out the door. We get some dialogue about being special versus being like everyone else. This episode is being a primer for what it means to be a "hero". Selfless. Special. Outsiders.
Simone is the woman Alexis' Ex tried to hit on. She wants him to help her deal with her psycho painter friend.
Back to Cheerleader. Mom wants to relate to her daughter more. Daughter mangles her hand in the garbage disposal. Boy, scenes with this girl are just going to be gross. Cheerleader decides to break it to her mother how special she is. No wait, she realizes she's adopted and claims she's old enough to know who her actual parents are.
Oh, her daddy is the creepy dude from India. He sounds like he's in some sort of secret form of law enforcement. CIA? we'll find out.
Back to Tokyo. Japanese guy is messing with time again. He teleported himself outside of the train. More than that, he teleported to New York. Oh, he's going to be fun. Especially if he didn't bring his passport. Homeland security, here we come.
The Heroes are starting to meet each other. Alexis' Ex and the Psycho Painter dude. Psycho painter dude has painted the flyboy. he also predicts a huge explosion in New York.
So, we have the looming threat, a dead scientist, and heroes discovering their powers.
We close with a Alexis' Ex proving to his brother that he's got a special power. He can stand on top of buildings and look like a rock star. In addition, he can fall off buildings. ...
And now we see his sleezy political brother can fly. But Alexis's Ex doesn't seem to have the talent. he slips off his brother's arm, but we don't see him fall to the ground, we end the scene.
Okay, I recorded Heroes on my Tivo.
Scene opens with Alexis Bledel's ex boyfriend jumping off the top of a skyscraper. It appears he can fly...or maybe not. Anyway, let me just say, if I broke up with Alexis Bledel, I'd be hurling myself off a tall building, too. Then he makes a bad pass at some woman. It appears he plays a nurse.
Switch to Madras, India. I see we're actually outsourcing our television scenes, too. Oh, and yet another show where we muse about how much of our brain power we actually use, and what would happen if we used one more percent? I'm thinking there would be more liberals out there. But oops, that's editorializing. But handsome Indian Professor finds out his father is dead. Apparently his father was involved in some controversial genetic research. So hot hindi professor is off to find his father's research papers and to find out more about why he died. Whatever the father's research was, it involved having a large world map placed on the wall.
Wow, it turns out that someone else was in his father's apartment in the next room while he entered. How lucky that he wasn't discovered.
Next scene, a hot young lass engaging in the entrepreneurial highjinks of webcam entertainment. Yes, it's a perfect time to play "Mustang Sally." Her customer is "Huggerz69" on AOL, given the interface. Oh! she's a single mom! Making a few extra bucks. This totally solves the child care problem.
Back to Alexis Bledel's ex. He thinks he can fly! He tells someone he can trust. Someone who doesn't believe him. Good job, big bro.
Back to cheerleader who can take infinite dirt naps without dying. She can impale herself. Ew. That bit with the exposed ribs was kinda gross. She's going to totally dust the competition at the annual "Bring it On" national cheerleader competition. She'll bring it, alright.
Change scene to a Japanese guy staring at a Japanese clock. He can make time reverse for one second. It looks like hard work. And he jumps up cheering and runs down the aisle to tell a friend. This Japanese friend happens to be watching mom's webcam. Everyone join me in singing "It's a Small World, After All".
And mom has some interesting powers with regard to her reflection. This comes to us during the end of a parent-teacher conference going badly.
Back to Alexis Bledel's ex. His mom's a klepto. She wants to feel alive again. Let the record reflect that his mother is a bitch. She's a major bitch.
Back to web-cam Mom. She's in debt and coming unravelled with this sense that someone else is watching her. Someone that she can't see. In addition to this nagging feeling that often plagues mental patients, she's 30k in debt.
Back to Cheerleader. She runs into a blazing factory fire. She wants to see if she can survive, but instead she leps a guy escape. She comes out as a human torch, but the burns heal. She runs off.
Hot Indian Professor has made it to Brooklyn. Queue Beastie Boys' "No Sleep 'Til Brooklyn". Oh, H.I.P. is getting a job as a taxi driver while he's here? Good to know. And he's got map locations that correspond to locations of our various potential heroes.
Switch scene to a flustered painter. A woman walks in. The same woman Alexis' ex tried to hit on. The painter's paintings are glimpses into the future. I wish he would paint me holding a billion dollars.
Back to Alexis' Ex. And his brother. His brother is offering him a job on his campaign. Let's recap: Mother is a bitch. Brother is a Son of a Bitch. He ditches his self-ish bro and hops into the cab of the H.I.P. What a coincidence. HIP's name is Mohinder, I think.
A special moment is coming: a solar eclipse. Web-cam mom goes back home and catches the hoods that are about to collect their 30k. The sleezebags ask for a strip show to give her an opportunity to lower her debt a little. I have a feeling they are about to get their asses kicked. Or maybe not. One of them appears to punch her as we cut to Japan.
Japanese guy is going to develop his powers and weave in and out of the space time continuum. But first, he's going to Karaoke night. Oh, and he's an X-men fan. Shocking. He proves his power by...
...Moving to a new scene, back to web-cam mom. She has indeed violently killed the mobsters. Or some other self only seen in mirrors. Hmmm.
We cut to Alexis' Ex. He ditches the cabby and runs to go meet Simone.
The creepy dude in HIP's Dad's apartment has trailed him back to New York. Mohinder stops the cab and runs like the dickens away from the strange guy with glasses.
Back to home of Cheerleader. Mother has froofy dumb dog. Cheerleader tells mom that she walked through fire and didn't get burned. Mom thinks she's speaking in metaphors. I want to euthanize Mr. Muggles. Even though he didn't do anything wrong.
Back to Japanese guy. He teleported into the woman's bathroom and got himself bounced out the door. We get some dialogue about being special versus being like everyone else. This episode is being a primer for what it means to be a "hero". Selfless. Special. Outsiders.
Simone is the woman Alexis' Ex tried to hit on. She wants him to help her deal with her psycho painter friend.
Back to Cheerleader. Mom wants to relate to her daughter more. Daughter mangles her hand in the garbage disposal. Boy, scenes with this girl are just going to be gross. Cheerleader decides to break it to her mother how special she is. No wait, she realizes she's adopted and claims she's old enough to know who her actual parents are.
Oh, her daddy is the creepy dude from India. He sounds like he's in some sort of secret form of law enforcement. CIA? we'll find out.
Back to Tokyo. Japanese guy is messing with time again. He teleported himself outside of the train. More than that, he teleported to New York. Oh, he's going to be fun. Especially if he didn't bring his passport. Homeland security, here we come.
The Heroes are starting to meet each other. Alexis' Ex and the Psycho Painter dude. Psycho painter dude has painted the flyboy. he also predicts a huge explosion in New York.
So, we have the looming threat, a dead scientist, and heroes discovering their powers.
We close with a Alexis' Ex proving to his brother that he's got a special power. He can stand on top of buildings and look like a rock star. In addition, he can fall off buildings. ...
And now we see his sleezy political brother can fly. But Alexis's Ex doesn't seem to have the talent. he slips off his brother's arm, but we don't see him fall to the ground, we end the scene.
