weaktwos

brittadotcom posited:

but also alcohol, yogurt & cheese are just other things that were already biologically processed through another organism before it became its yummy self...just because those are "only" microorganisms does it make a difference?

Excellent point, Britta! However, your point is lessened by the fact Alcohol, yogurt and most cheeses taste good!

Move over, Scott McClellan, I'm ready to handle the President's press conferences, now.

But seriously, I shall take a lesson from the inspirational Anne Elk and posit a new theory that is mine and mine alone. That theory is this:

Anything that excreted by an animal that is cute to the human eye is not to be intentionally eaten.

During preliminary testing, this theory has held up:

-Human babies: on the whole, very cute. Their excretions, though arguably aromatic and occasionally vibrant are not to be eaten. There's probably nutritional value therein, but...no.
-Puppies: You'd think owning a puppy would entail that the whole house could subsist on puppy chow. You feed the dog, and then you could eat whatever comes out of Bisquit the Wonderpuppy. But no.
-Kittens: Who here as willingly partaken of kitty roca that did not involve a drunken bet? Who even agreed to the bet?
-Cows: Okay, the theory starts to fall apart. Milk and cream are tasty, but well ruminated cow patties? No.

Ah well, back to the drawing board on that theory.