A sample of my m4d Cust0m3r s3rv1c3 sk1llz

[weaktwos]

The setup:
We are giving away our old ibm p70 crt monitors. They are OLD. They are beige. They are ugly. But hey, they are also free, so 400 people signed up to receive one. Here's a correspondence between me and an interested, yet delusional customer:


_____________________________________________
From: DD
Sent: Friday, March 04, 2005 1:14 PM
To: Anne
Subject: RE: Monitor Giveaway Information!

CAN WE CHOSE THE COLOR OF OUR MONITOR?

_____________________________________________

From: Anne
Sent: Friday, March 04, 2005 1:15 PM
To: DD
Subject: RE: Monitor Giveaway Information!

We have three colors to choose from: antique beige, antique beige, and antique beige. Which one do you want? ;-)


_____________________________________________
From: DD
Sent: Friday, March 04, 2005 1:16 PM
To: Anne
Subject: RE: Monitor Giveaway Information!

HEHEHEEHH

MY COMPUTER AT HOME IS BACK, I WOULD LIKE A BLACK MONITOR… THANKS U HEHEHE I PREFERRED A FLAT MONITOR HEHEHEHEH J/K

_____________________________________________
From: Anne
Sent: Friday, March 04, 2005 1:17 PM
To: DD
Subject: RE: Monitor Giveaway Information!

Yes, wouldn’t we all.  Alas, we are only giving away the unattractive beige IBM 17” crts. 


_____________________________________________
From: DD
Sent: Friday, March 04, 2005 1:17 PM
To: Anne
Subject: RE: Monitor Giveaway Information!

SO IS IT BLACK?

_____________________________________________
From: Anne
Sent: Friday, March 04, 2005 1:19 PM
To: DD
Subject: RE: Monitor Giveaway Information!

We like to call it a “Wish Black”. It looks beige to all non-believers, but those who have vivid imaginations view it as black.


__________________________________________
From: DD
Sent: Friday, March 04, 2005 1:20 PM
To: Anne
Subject: RE: Monitor Giveaway Information!

OK THANKS HEHEHEHE, DO I JUST DRIVE THRU CLM DRIVE IN ?

________________________________________________
FromAnne
Sent: Friday, March 04, 2005 1:20 PM
To: DD
Subject: RE: Monitor Giveaway Information!

Just drive through…we’ll bring up the drive-thru gates.
_______________________________________________________
From: DD
Sent: Friday, March 04, 2005 1:14 PM
To: Anne
Subject: RE: Monitor Giveaway Information!


PLEZ MAKE SURE ITS BLACK EHHEEHEH

Comments

[modeleccentric.livejournal.com]

I sense great restraint..great restraint....aww fuckit. was laughing my ass off. will you be handing the yob his "black" monitor?

[weaktwos.livejournal.com]

I probably will.

And yes, restraint was involved. ;-)

[modeleccentric.livejournal.com]

I'm thinking a can of black spray paint might be in order- "Factory Option."
Metalflake black. geez..

[weaktwos.livejournal.com]

Primer.

[modeleccentric.livejournal.com]

better.

*PEES*

[clemidia.livejournal.com]

And I see Annie at the window, spray can in hand, spraying it as he drives up.

Remember the crayon quiz? I wrote some new ones. May I suggest Midwest Winter Slush?

Or, Moronic Breeder Mole Black?

[namfle.livejournal.com]

You have an unimaginably deep well of patience.

That wasn't funny, it was scary to think that is the sort of folk you have to work with! Ai!


-elf-